


Sweet Tweets

by Taeryfai



Series: Live and Let Avenge [14]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Dad, Bakery and Coffee Shop, Bucky Barnes Is In A Band, Cafe AU, Clint is a bit of a mess, Clint likes bird puns, Clint likes coffee, F/M, Hela is Loki’s angsty teen daughter, M/M, Parent Loki (Marvel), Parent Tony Stark, The band is called the Winter Soldiers, They're all dorks, Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tony Stark is Good With Kids, clint is a dork, dad Loki, dad tony stark
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2020-05-16 03:30:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19309735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taeryfai/pseuds/Taeryfai
Summary: Clint owns a coffee shop. His employees are mean to him and one of these days he should fire them. It's not his fault one of his customers grabs his attention.Basically a café and dad AU no one asked for, but I did anyway.





	Sweet Tweets

He was a regular this older gentleman. Although gentleman wasn't the right word for it, gentleman brought to mind thoughts of posh English gentlemen sipping tea in their tweed suits, top hats and monocles, whilst they planned on shooting some clay pigeons, going horse riding or playing croquet. Oh good heavens, ho ho jolly good show old chap, god bless the queen. That sort of gentleman was certainly not this man.

This man wore leather jackets, ripped jeans and looked like he owned a motorcycle. If Clint was to describe him quickly he was the classic cool guy. He pulled off the ‘cool' look without seeming to be in the middle of a mid-life crisis, a thin line to tread. He had this cool little earring thing that connected from the upper ear to the lobe which Clint was in awe about. It looked like a baby dragon curled itself around his ear to go asleep. The goatee was well tailored and managed not to fall into evil villain stage, Clint was impressed as he found it hard to grow a beard and if he did it always straggly at first. He just ended up shaving it off because of how patchy it started off as, and how much he got teased over it. All he wanted was to wake up one morning and, poof, instant majestic beard. Was that too much to ask?

The man always brought his own coffee in a flask, he was both awed and annoyed by the man's gall to bring his own coffee to a coffee shop. His inner nerd made him far too curious about what exactly was in the flask, maybe he read too much Harry Potter but his bet was on Polyjuice. He kind of hoped it was actually Polyjuice potion as how cool would that actually be.

He definitely did not spend too much time pondering who exactly this man was or just in awe at how cool he was. He totally did not take note of the young boy who sometimes tagged along and did his homework opposite whilst the man worked on his laptop. The cute kid called the man ‘dad’ and Clint was mortified when Natasha (or Natalie or Natalia, she got a different name badge every so often and she wouldn't actually tell her what her actual real name was, he could just look it up but that would ruin her fun) this cute redhead that worked as a barista here told him that she would happily call the man ‘Daddy’ any day of the week. Or night, she happily told him with a smirk.

To terrorise him further Bucky (the part-timer who was also in some kind of band and unfairly handsome) had to agree with her whilst pointedly licking his lips. He definitely hadn't needed the ‘Too hot, hot dad’ remark Bucky made. To punish them both for their inappropriate comments he made them both go do something away from him. Bucky to remove all that eyeshadow and mascara he had to wear which made him look like a rejected KISS member. That or unpin that silly red star he insisted on sewing onto the left arm of all his clothing, he didn’t care whether or not it was his ‘brand’. Natalia (that was her name badge that day) to go wash her hands or something. Really he had just been making excuses so they couldn't embarrass him further.

Natasha, Clint wasn't sure whether she changed her name badge mid shift again or whether he misremembered it, she told him that he was a mess and Clint did not see why she would say something like that to him. His employees were terrible to him and he hated them. Sometimes. He was not overly fixated on his man who was such a regular that not only Clint had memorised his regular orders (he liked blueberries on a Monday) but the man called him and his employees all by name without having to refer to their name badges (even Natalie!). Yet Clint still didn't know his name or what he did or anything, he was not a mess to feel mildly distressed over that. He was going to fire Natasha one day for being mean to him.

Someone new walked in today, it wasn't that unusual although the Birds’ Nest mainly dealt in locals and regulars, Clint took note of it however as he was different to their usual clientele. The Birds’ Nest (the name of his quaint little coffee shop) mainly attracted the student demographic with their cheap but good coffee and sweet treats. Also he had lucked out on attractive staff who helped keep the regulars, the amount of giggling girls that fawned over Bucky was disgusting. Natalia had her fair share of admirers, Clint was put out over the fact he did not have any. They had other customers as well but they weren't used to catering for someone so obviously far more used to classier joints.

The man was in a god damn three piece suit for Pete’s sake! Clint decided he did not like this man near instantly, mainly because of the thinly veiled disdain on his face looking at both the staff and the ‘fine establishment’. Clint disliked him more for calling his little shop that, it was the way the man just seemed to ooze sarcasm in the way he said them.

“Do you have any coffee not named after a bird?” This man was degrading his coffee shop in front of him. Now this man seemed like one of those English gentlemen, he must have at least one horse, he had a stuck up air around him besides he definitely had a hint of an English accent. He did not want to call him a gentleman though as although he seemed cordial on the surface he was absolutely sneering underneath. Clint just knew it.

“No. We don't, birds are cool.” Clint was not pouting as he said this, the man looked down at him from the corner of his eye.

“Yes… cool.” He muttered as if he did not believe that statement, like 'cool' was some kind of dirty word. Clint wanted to gasp and try to hold all his heart strings together, first everyone was mean to him and now the birds were under attack. Not the birds! This man probably hunted real birds in his estate or something, the monster.

“Loki. Leave the kid alone.” A warm voice said jovially. It was Hot Dad! He was rather annoyed that was the name that stuck. Curse you Bucky and your little band too. He was a little put out to be called a kid, he wasn’t that young, he had his own little business after all. However Hot Dad was staging a rescue attempt so he was honoured.

“I was merely enquiring if there was anything in here not bird themed, it's his job to interact with me. Why do you even come here?” Loki sniffed, apparently Loki was the mean man’s name. He was curious how Hot Dad knew this man, they looked like they would travel in different circles.

“Birds are cool.” Clint barely contained a little gasp of joy at the statement. Hot Dad thought birds were cool! He hoped he liked dogs, then again how could someone not like dogs? This Loki fellow probably didn't like dogs, the heathen. This Loki was clearly either a cat person or hunted animals for sport.

“Really Anthony?” Loki sighed placing his hand lightly on Hot Dad's (Anthony's!) elbow. Anthony gave a small smile and seemed to lean into the touch.

“Well it's a pleasure to see you again, Mr. Silvertounge.” Loki Silvertounge, what a stupid name. His parents probably hated him to call him that, no wonder he seemed like such a prick he probably resented such a name.

“Likewise.” Loki said curtly removing his hand from Anthony’s elbow to shake hands. Clint felt awkward as while they were appearing to get reacquainted he was here waiting patiently to take their order if they were even going to order anything. Go on have a full conversation, nevermind there potentially being better things he could do with his time or there being other people wanting to be served.

“He'll take the Canary Tea Latte in one of those fancy little glass mugs, and I'll have black coffee. I’ll also have a blue bird.” Anthony finally appeared to acknowledge him. A man after his own heart, Clint was happy just to drink black coffee straight from the jug. It was interesting to see that he was having blueberries on a day other than a Monday though. He started a little at the thought that Anthony (he didn't look like an Anthony, he did but he didn't, Clint knew what he meant) actually drinking their coffee not whatever he drank from his flask.

“He's paying.” Anthony added with a soft grin at the other man's stormy look at the statement. Loki huffed but elegantly held out his hard ready to pay. Were they together? Aww, Hot Dad, no. This Loki seemed like a right prick. You could do better Hot Dad.

They sat at the same table together looking like an odd pair, Loki seemed a little too distinguished to ‘lower’ himself to someone like Anthony's presence. Their hands were practically touching and Clint felt a wave of disappointment, why did you have to do this Hot Dad? Clint had been picturing him with his friend Steve for weeks now. In his head it was the perfect match not whatever this was.

“Is it me or is Hot Dad looking extra hot today?” Bucky asked resting his elbows on the counter next to Clint after the next customer was served. His sudden arrival startled Clint, between Bucky and Natasha he was bound to have a heart attack at some point, they were a pair of stealthy ninjas. Bucky had grown an impressive amount of stubble again, an annoyingly perfect beard shape at that as opposed to Clint’s patchy attempts. Bucky could probably achieve the instant majestic beard if he put his mind to it, the bastard.

“You need a shave, health and safety.” Clint scolded, but he had to agree that Anthony had put in extra effort into his looks today. It was definitely a date. Bucky turned to face him fully and gave him a small soft smile. Clint disliked when he did that, he did not want these small secretive smiles that he knew meant something but he had yet to decipher. Nat did it too. It was frustrating.

“Hot Dad's name is Anthony.” Clint stated “But I think he suits Tony better.” Bucky’s eyebrows quirked upwards in surprise at that piece of information.

“You actually plucked up the courage to ask?” Clint found it somewhat offensive how ludicrous Bucky made it out to be.

“No, not exactly.” Clint admitted. “His date there called him by name.”

Bucky looked at Clint in disbelief before letting out a snort of laughter. “You think they're dating?” There was the friendly touch that Bucky liked to give him but Clint liked to ignore. The way Bucky’s hand rested on his lower shoulder made him uncomfortable in a way he did not want to discuss.

“Look at them, they're practically making out.” Clint stated in disgust as the two men at the table look over some kind of paperwork.

“Looks like business to me.” Nat, he was just going to stick to Nat rather than bother with all her many names, said giving him another mini heart attack after she lurked up behind him.

“You both know nothing, look at how close they are to each other.” Clint said feeling a bit like a conspiracy theorist the way they were both looking at him incredulously.

“They have to be, to read the same page. Besides they shook hands, why would you shake hands with a date?” Bucky was agreeing with Nat. Always ganging up on him.

“I guess I'll take the order over, and do all the work then, whilst you three gossip.” Scott Lang huffed taking the tray. Clint felt a little guilty, he tended to forget Scott was there half the time as he got on with the work (admittedly with several quips, he was funny when Clint listened) instead of bothering him like Nat and Bucky did. He just seemed to shrink into the background around those two. Clint should probably give the man a bonus, he had a kid well he was fairly sure he did at least, yeah he'll give the man a bonus as long as he remembered to do so.

“Look, Poshy McPoshface just handed him something and he took it. It's not only a date, they've been dating for a while.”

“What has handing something to someone have to do with anything?” Nat said tutting slightly in amusement as she then too decided to lay her hand on him comfortably as if it wasn't a big deal. Clint was keenly aware of both of their hands on him and he was flabbergasted how neither of them seemed to think anything of it.

“Haven't you noticed?” Clint was a little incredulous, he supposed Hot Dad was a germaphobe or something, he didn't want to pry but he took note of how he'd prefer not to be handed things. Clint was nice like that and liked to make note of what people preferred, for instance, there was this one man hated small change and always put his pennies in the little jar Clint had out for donations for good dogs. Clint just handed him the majority of the change putting pennies in the jar automatically now.

“Okay Mister Hawkeye, we all don't watch people like you do.” Nat snarked at him, rude. Could be worse, could have been a name _not_ related to a bird. But still.

"Isn't the phrase Eagle eyed?" Bucky mused, deciding to bloody well rest his chin upon his shoulder like it was not some kind of sin. Even if it did not count officially as a sin, it sure as hell felt like one.

"Birdie here, likes hawks better. Besides Eagle-eye sounds a bit off." Clint was flattered that Nat remembered his order of preference when it came to birds, but did she have to mirror Bucky with her chin upon his free shoulder.

Then Hot Dad, or rather Anthony seemed to notice them watching his table as he looked up and gave Clint a slight grin and little wave. Meanie McPoshface looked up as well and gave a soft, long suffering sigh with a slight roll of his eyes. Clint felt his blood decide that his cheeks was the hottest new vacation spot and decided to all take immediate relocation there. This was mortifying. Hot Dad had caught him watching him, this had never happened before, he was the king of discreet. Naturally the blame laid on Nat and Bucky both.

Clint turned around with all the speed of a guilty man, thus cementing to Anthony that yes, he had been gawking at him like the loser he was. Bucky and Nat however had no shame, quite languid in disguising the fact they too were watching.

"I'm a terrible person." Clint announced, deciding that he was a social wreck, that he should become a hermit and denounce society. It was probably for the best.

"I for one think you're a cute person." Nat argued, which did not succeed in lessening his blush. Thanks a lot Nat, now how was he supposed to go to sleep later tonight with his brain bound to bring those words to the forefront to his mind and trying to work out what they meant.

"Definitely more cute than terrible." Bucky agreed, which Clint could not deal with. Are they trying to kill him? Surely Hot Dad catching him watching was a death sentence enough, did they have to push him further?

"Scott is now my favourite, you two are terrible, horrible people and are demoted. Do some work both of you, or I'll send you home and give Scott your wages." Clint declared making shooing notions with his hands at the duo. They obliged, but they had to do it with those secretive little smiles.

When Scott came back, Clint made sure to show his new favouritism by giving the man the 'Im-peck-able' badge reserved for the goodest of workers. Bucky saw and mimed a heart breaking in two with a pout.

"Gee thanks. A badge." Scott didn't seem too enthused over his badge for some reason, but he wore it and that was what mattered.

 


End file.
